The Thursday Times

– A University of Illinois professor has been fired… for teaching the Catholic Church’s view of homosexuality. Kenneth Howell was teaching a class called Introduction to Catholicism in which he discussed “how the theory of utilitarianism and natural law theory would judge the morality of homosexual acts”. One student decided that this amounted to “hate speech” and sent a complaint letter to the head of the religious studies department, who then fired Howell. So now you can’t even teach what the Church believes? The world as I understood it makes less and less sense every day.

– Say what you will about the British, but their soldiers are badass. Lance Corporal Luke Reeson was on patrol in Nad-e-Ali, Afghanistan when an insurgent took a shot at him. The bullet hit Reeson’s body armor and went into his mouth, shattering his jaw. Reeson spit out the bullet and calmly walked two miles back to his camp, where he was given immediate medical attention before being flown home for surgery. Oh, and he’s now back on duty in Afghanistan.

– Rion Harmon is a musician from New York who records under the name The Zax. When he found out that Heidi Montag’s latest album sold 658 physical copies, he decided that he could do better than that. And thus, helpmesellmorerecordsthanheidimontag.com was born.

– Speaking of music, the guys over at Funny or Die recently disguised pop star Jewel with a wig, prosthetic nose, fake butt, and frumpy clothes and sent her to a karaoke bar… to sing Jewel songs! Disguised as “Karen”, a woman in town for a frozen foods convention, and surrounded by “co-workers”, she put on a show… and the crowd’s reaction is priceless. Check it out here. The best part? When Jewel, discussing the prosthetic, points to her own nose and says “yes, this nose got bigger“.

– You ever pronounce a word incorrectly for years and years? Or carefully dissect a kiwifruit instead of just slicing it in half and eating it with a spoon? Or only figure out after 20 years of driving that the little notches on the flap of your gas tank cover are to hold your gas cap whilst fueling? You’re not alone. This thread over at Metafilter has hundreds of comments from people who were doing something wrong for years and years until someone corrected them. My own confession: it wasn’t until last year, while watching an episode of Good Eats, that I learned how to hold a chef’s knife properly.

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