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Simon’s Picks – Week 7

SimonHey, ya’ll! Simon here again! It’s Wednesday morning and I’m here at the house, sipping a MANMOSA and looking over last week’s picks. I went 9-4, which is pretty good for a lil’ ol’ ‘kitty! Too bad the boys from San Fran and Philly won – by all rights I should have been 11-2 last week! But that’s all water under the bridge, honey! Let’s see if I can do even better this week!

Seahawks at Browns: Everything about the Cleveland Browns is just horrible! Their awful colors, their boring costumes, the lack of a logo, that silly fan area known as the Dawg Pound (dogs are sooo yucky!), the fact that they’re in Cleveland… It’s all so positively awful. Terrible. So not fabulous. But you know what? Those boys from the Prune City are gonna have their way with those latte sippin’ sea-chickens from Seattle. Take Cleveland on this one, baby!

Falcons at Lions: Ya’ll might know that my daddy is from Atlanta. Ya’ll might not know that the Falcons are his #2 team. Daddy once said that he wanted members of the Atlanta Falcons to be pallbearers at his funeral, “so they can let me down one last time”. Daddy can be so funny sometimes. But he’s right. The Falcons are flying high after their big win against my hometown kitties last week. But that hot defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh is gonna feast on bird this week, while sexy Matt Stafford and Calvin Johnson are gonna hook up in my dreams on the field for big scores, girls! Take Detroit by at least ten points!

Texans at Titans: I don’t like nicknames like “Titans”. Simon knows what a big, sexy, strappin’, swaggerin’, cowboy hat wearin’ Texan is… but just what the heck is a “Titan”? Is Tennessee gonna put Cornelius Vanderbilt on the field on Sunday? Some old Greek warriors in those sexy skirts? I don’t know, so that’s why I’m going with Houston for this game. Well, that and the fact that those yummy Texans will be out for blood after losing to those awful ratbirds from Balwmer last week!

Broncos at Dolphins: Oh my gawd! This game is totally like two fat girls fighting over the last slice of pie: sure, someone will win, but in the end they’re both losers! Simon would love to pull for the Dolphins, as they have the best colors and costumes of any football team anywhere. Plus, Miami is just fabulous no matter which way you look at it! After all, they don’t have sexy mens on South Beach in Denver, do they? But the Football Feline is pretty sure that cute lil’ Tim Tebow will be able to pull out a win against the flailing fish this week. Pick Denver, even if you have to hold your nose while doing it!

Continue reading “Simon’s Picks – Week 7”

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-10-16

  • Wow! For the first time since December 6, 1982, no team from Florida is in the AP Top 25! GT is #12 Go Jackets! #
  • Hate the #Pats but lovin' their throwbacks today! #
  • @AnglophileA Have fun at the show! #
  • @calman3000 Dude, that's AWESOME! Bet it smells great, too! 🙂 #
  • So is Occupy Atlanta still going on? Have they started passing out grape Flavor Aid yet? #SeriouslyItsACult #
  • If you REALLY want to evict the protesters from Zuccotti Park, give 'em trans fats and cigarettes. Bloomberg would have them out in minutes! #
  • I am the 318th follower of the great @GaryCole_ Woo-Hoo! #

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Marilyn knows what’s up!

In September 1952, Marilyn Monroe visited the campus of Georgia Tech to do a photo shoot for Look magazine. As Tech were the national champions that year, the magazine did a four-page spread about the team and their legendary coach, Bobby Dodd. Here’s a copy of the original cover picture, sans the masthead and cover blurbs:

Marilyn_Monroe_Look_Magazine_1952-09-09

I’ve looked all over the Internet and haven’t been able to find a digital copy of the article, but you can buy a copy of the magazine here for the low, low price of $168! Marilyn was sooooo hot, and she looked especially good in the Tech sweater!

GO JACKETS! TO HELL WITH GEORGIA!

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Simon’s Picks – Week 6

SimonHey, ya’ll! Simon here! I’m not much of a football fan, but my daddy loves the game so most Sundays I watch those handsome, sweaty mens on the TV… and let me tell you something: I know fabulous, so here are my picks for week 6!

 


Panthers at Falcons: You’d think I’d pull for my hometown kitties, wouldn’t you? After all, they’ve got that young, sexy stud Cam Newton… and that Steve Smith, who I know from personal experience has some talented hands! But I tell you what: the Birds are still smartin’ from that bare bottom spankin’ Aaron Rogers gave them on Sunday, and they’ll be out for revenge. I like Atlanta, although the Kitties will make it interesting.

Colts at Bengals: Now here are some kitties I can get behind! Without that handsome Peyton Manning, the Colts just don’t have the ju-ju to get it done, girlfriend! I normally don’t care for redheads, but that sexy Bengals rookie Andy Dalton will surely get it done this week! I take Cincinnati, big time!

49ers at Lions: Now, you know I should pull for the 49ers, because they’re from my emotional home town… And the boys from Fog City have not only looked fabulous this year, they’ve actually played pretty well, too. But my feline intuition tells me to stick with those handsome tom cats from Detroit. Matthew Stafford’s strong, manly arms and Calvin Johnson’s skull-crackin’ thighs will make mincemeat outta those boys from San Fran. Detroit will win this one, honey!

Rams at Packers: Giiiirrrrlll, lemme tell you about Clay Matthews. That masculine jaw… that chiseled chest… that long, flowing blond hair… Mmmmm-mmm-mmmm! Now, where was I? Oh yes, the pick. Well, if it were just about which makes the better gay double entendre, you’d have a tough time picking between the Rams and the Packers. Thankfully it’s not: go with Green Bay all the way, baby!

Bills at Giants: I have a confession to make: for a long time, I had no idea who “Bill” was, and why they named a football team after him. Then Daddy explained that there was this guy named “Buffalo Bill” and people in Buffalo thought it would be funny to name their team after him! Humans are weird. But in this battle of red, white and blue, I’m going for Buffalo to beat Rachel Maddow’s team! [Author’s note: Daddy has just informed me that a guy named Eli Manning, not Rachel Maddow, is the quarterback for the Giants.]

Jaguars at Steelers: Now, I normally would pick the kitties, since they’re my cousins and all. But since they’re playing my daddy’s team, I’ll have to pick Pittsburgh if I wanna get walkies this week. And besides, as Longines and Pepper would say, “nothin’ good ever came outta Jacksonville, honey!”

Continue reading “Simon’s Picks – Week 6”

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Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-10-09

  • Dumb joke of the day – Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre! #
  • @informedblackmn TastyKakes are AWESOME! Especialy the butterscotch and peanut butter varieties! #
  • Hooray! Amanda Knox is free! 🙂 #
  • R.I.P. Steve Jobs #
  • Fire up your web browsers! Philip Glenister's new series, #hidden stats in only a couple of hours! 🙂 #
  • @jenny_wade Happy birthday, pretty lady! 🙂 #
  • "Do you see yourself more like, as a rapist who does magic, or a magician who also likes to rape?" #TheLeague #
  • Eating 5 year-old Bimini Bread I found in the freezer yesterday. Still good! #
  • It's the MOST WONDERFUL day of the year: CHILI COOK-OFF DAY!!!! #
  • Gameday!! #gojackets #stingem #stingtheturtle #gatech #
  • There's an guy in a J. Geils Band shirt at the chili cook-off…. #
  • The New York Times endorsing Occupy Wall Street is like King Louis XVI endorsing the guillotine. #
  • This years #pmchantillychilicookoff rocked as always! Thanks to #Goose and the gang for another year of chili and fundraising for hospice! #
  • Another delicious dinner @diamondclt! #

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R.I.P. Steve Jobs

From his famous commencement speech at Stamford in 2005:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

I own two iPods, but could otherwise not give a damn about Apple products. I find Apple’s products to be both hostile and clueless to enterprise. I find Apple’s computers to be pretty in design but mediocre in specs and execution and terribly overpriced. And there are few people in this world more annoying than Apple fanboys. In short, I’m not an “Apple guy”, nor will I ever be.

However, the very first computer I ever owned was an Apple II+. I spent hours upon hours upon hours using it. And it wasn’t just a simple machine. It was a veritable spaceship that could take me almost anywhere I wanted to go. I learned BASIC and a bit of Pascal on it, and learned to make all those transistors work for me. I eventually got a modem and discovered the world of BBSs and online information services. And my world was no longer limited to Snellville, Georgia. Using this magic box, I could communicate with people all over the globe… instantly.

Moreso than any other single device, the Apple II+ changed my life. And for that, I am eternally grateful.

Thanks, Steve.

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More Politics

I generally try to stay away from politics on this site, mostly because it’s so polarizing. If you don’t like Mad Men reviews, you can just skip over them and not think anything of it. However, political issues tend to excite people’s passions, and I don’t want to alienate readers. So I tend to stay away usually. Usually. But sometimes things just get get my blood pressure up, and I need to vent. And today is one of those days.

First of all, can someone explain to me how Arizona’s proposed illegal immigration law is not a legitimate exercise of a sovereign state’s police powers? See, here’s my line of thinking: back in the 1950s, various Southern states chose to ignore the federal integration laws. So the Feds sent in troops to ensure that Southern universities allowed blacks to enroll. So a state ignored a federal law, and the Feds decided to enforce the law. And the liberals thought this was a good thing. But when the Feds decided to ignore their own immigration laws, Arizona decided to take their own initiative. So the Feds ignored their own law, and a state decided to pass a law to remedy the situation… and now the liberals are calling foul. So which is it – can one sovereign pass a law when another sovereign willfully chooses to ignore an existing statute or not?

And why is it that when GOP candidate Rick Perry decides to go to a Christian retreat, the mainstream media cries foul and doubles their ink orders… but when candidate Obama met with members of the New Black Panthers that same media completely ignores it. What’s more, when those same Black Panthers were accused of some of those most blatant voter intimidation ever seen in the United States, Obama’s friend and Attorney General Eric Holder somehow decided not to prosecute anyone for it. And yes, this is the same Eric Holder who recently lied to Congress about the so-called “Operation Fast and Furious” (in a nutshell, the ATF allowed over 2,000 guns to be sold to people it knew worked for the Mexican drug cartels as a means of making a bigger legal case against the cartels; at least two US Border Patrol and ICE agents were killed with guns ATF allowed to be smuggled into Mexico, to say nothing of the dozens of Mexicans who died thanks to the operation). Holder told Congress, under oath, that the first he’d heard of Fast and Furious was around April 2011, but CBS News found documents which indicate that Holder was briefed on the operation as early as July 2010.

Say what you will about George W. Bush. Hey, he wasn’t my favorite guy, either. In fact, he’s the reason I changed my voter registration from Republican to Libertarian. But at least when Bush wanted to kill American citizens, he did it the old-fashioned way: by sending troops to Iraq and Afghanistan to get shot or blown up. Obama hasn’t got the honor or stones to do that, so he just uses Predator drones to kill American citizens. Yes, Anwar al-Awlaki was a bad person. He was on every terror watch list there is, and the world is probably a better place without him. But it’s astonishing that no one seems to give a damn that the Obama administration, under the advice of the CIA, essentially executed an American citizen without a trial or due process of any kind. This, from the same people who crucified the Bush administration’s policies in the media. Dick Cheney wants an apology from them, and personally I think he’s due one. I also can’t wait until Obama deploys Predators here in the United States so they can execute his political enemies as well. And hey, perhaps he can follow Bev Perdue’s advice and suspend elections until he gets his way.

What the fuck happened to America?

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Oh you Liberals!

Liberals crack me up. This picture is of a “Constitutionally-protected form of political satire that forms a clever juxtaposition between the policies of Adolf Hitler and George W. Bush”:

Bush and HilterThis picture, however, is a “racist hate crime”:

Obama DiaperGod bless you hypocritical do-gooders! Please don’t ever change!