Well, we’re three episodes in to the American version of Life On Mars… and my verdict: it sucks. Here’s why:
No Smoking: Once again, the people behind Life On Mars US apparently think that no one smoked in 1973. Whereas the original Life On Mars had as much smoking as an episode of Mad Men, in the American version not only does no one smoke, there aren’t even any ashtrays around! Seriously – in last night’s episode Sam and Gene went to a gay bar, and not only was no one smoking (in a gay bar?!?), there wasn’t even an ashtray to be seen anywhere! I know this is a small detail, but come on… how can you be “historically accurate” yet not have people smoking? Oh, and Ray holding a pen like a cigarette doesn’t count!
The Plots Are Too Simple: One of the main “selling points” of Life On Mars (in general) is that we can watch people existing in the recent past, all the while knowing what happens in their future. For example, in the original Life On Mars, Gene Hunt says that “[t]here will never be a woman prime minister as long as I have a hole up my arse”. Both the UK and US versions play this up for humor (last night’s episode had a “wink-wink” moment about gay marriage). But whereas the British version of the show chose not to make everything so black and white, the American version goes for the easy kill. In last night’s episode, a gay man – a war hero apparently “perfect” in every way except for his sexuality – is murdered. I just knew the whole “gays are people, too!” thing was coming… and it did. In the UK version, the gay man would have had something else in his past – an addiction to pornography, or gambling, or something – to give the show some ambiguity and make it feel less like an ABC After School Special.
Gene Hunt: In the original Life On Mars, Philip Glenister’s Gene Hunt was a larger-than-life force of nature. He absolutely dominated every scene he was in, both physically and mentally. As I’ve noted several times on this website, he was a chain smoking, whiskey swilling, sausage eating racist, sexist homophobe… that you just couldn’t help but fall in love with. Glenister’s Hunt was a good man underneath his ugly facade, and he made many of us long for the simpler times in which he existed – including a surprising number of British women, who found Hunt to be a sort of sex symbol. In short, Gene Hunt – as played by Philip Glenister – took his place among the hallowed pantheon of TV cops. In my book, Glenister’s Hunt is right up there with Joe Friday, Theo Kojak, Jimmy McNulty and Andy Sipowicz. Harvey Keitel’s Gene Hunt, on the other hand, is barely memorable. But that might not be his fault because…
The Writing Sucks: Sure, ABC managed to fit in Gene’s famous “You’re surrounded by armed bastards!” line (delivered like crap by Keitel, by the way). But can you name any other quotes from this series so far? Hell, I can rattle off a couple dozen Gene Hunt quotes from the original series just from memory. In addition to the “woman prime minister” quote from above, there’s:
“You great… soft… sissy… girlie… nancy… French… bender… Man United supporting POOF!”
“I think she’s as fake as a tranny’s fanny.”
“It doesn’t take a degree in applied bollocks to know whats going on…”
“What I call a dream involves Diana Dors and a bottle of chip oil!”
“This case is going as fast as a bunch of spastics in a magnet factory.”
“Well done Miss Marple, that’s why we need women detectives!”
“He’s got fingers in more pies than a leper on a cookery course.”
“Murderers do not play tennis!”
“Drugs, eh? What’s the point. They make you forget, make you talk funny, make you see things that aren’t there. My old grandma got all of that for free when she had a stroke.”
Have we had anything as memorable from the American version so far? I think not.
The overall “feel” of the show sucks: The original Life On Mars was a cop show at heart, with a giant dose of time travel\sci-fi mixed in. The American version feels like any other cop show, but with the “sci-fi” bits added on as an afterthought.
Ray and Chris aren’t friends: In the original version, Ray Carling and Chris Skelton are buddies. You rarely saw one without the other. There’s no trace of their relationship in the US version of the show, and Ray is far more openly antagonistic towards Sam than the British original.
What’s with Sam’s neighbor?: In the original, Sam is frequently visited by the little girl seen in the BBC’s test card F, which would come on the TV after the BBC went off the air for the evening, and Sam had dozed off. There’s nothing like this at all (so far) in the US version… except for perhaps Sam’s neighbor. Now, she’s kind of hot, so I don’t mind looking at her… but is she real? Is she a figment of his imagination? Or is she just some hippy neighbor that “understands” Sam?
I could go on and on… but you get my point, right? I’ll keep watching the US version of Life On Mars, but after three episodes I can safely say that there’s absolutely, positively no way that this version could even be “as good as” the original (like The Office), to say nothing of being better than the original.
So… if you wanna watch Life On Mars… buy the DVDs of the original series instead!
So… if you wanna watch Life On Mars… buy the DVDs of the original series instead!
I stick to the US version for now. Or until it’s cancelled.
It’s nice to know that you’re unwilling to give this show a chance after three episodes. Like so many television executives and viewers, you guys want instant hits like “LOST”, “HEROES” and “DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES”, instead of allowing a show to improve withe age . . . like they used to do.
I would add further commentary, but I’m feeling too disgusted right now.
“too disgusted right now”? Whatever!
I’m not looking for “instant hits”. I was one of the few fans of “The Office” (US) when it first came on and was struggling. I’m a huge fan of “Pushing Daisies”, which is anything BUT an “instant hit”. As you know, Lee, I’m also a Maddict, and although “Mad Men” is a critical favorite, it still pulls less than 2 million viewers an episode. Again, hardly an “instant hit”. In fact, it seems that my favorite shows – “American Gothic”, “Twin Peaks”, “Wonderfalls”, “Keen Eddie”, “Veronica Mars”, “Popular”, “Undeclared” and “Freaks and Geeks”, to name just a few – are anything BUT instant hits. They were all shows that needed time to find an audience, but sadly, that didn’t happen.
The problem with “Life On Mars” is that it can never be the original series. As I said in my review of the leaked LOM pilot, I was of two minds about the US version: on one had, I was happy that LOM would be exposed to a wide audience. Anything to get the LOM story out was cool with me. On the other hand, I was afraid that they’d screw it up (like the US version of “Coupling”).
Now, I don’t think the US LOM is a full-blown disaster (like “Coupling”), but I don’t think it’s anywhere as good as the original. I have specific issues with the casting of the US version, and some of the decisions that the producers have made. It’s their show, they can run it their way. But I resent you saying that I’m only interested in an “instant hit” like “Housewives” or “Lost”.
Never seen “Heroes”, BTW.
Like so many television executives and viewers, you guys want instant hits like “LOST”, “HEROES” and “DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES”,
Emhm…..None of those shows were good.
The British life on Mars was pure excellence, the American one was just a watered down swamped with orange filters piece of rubbish.
Just seen the first “Life on Mars US” which just aired here in UK. Not overly impressed – (didnt see original UK LOM but huge fan of A2A)
I dont like Harvey Keitel as Gene – too small, lacks presence and seems about 100 years old. He doesnt seem to be the “big” character Gene was.
Not sure if perhaps they are trying to make Sam the “main” character.
Really agree with your Disneyfication comment – to set the 70’s scene all Sam seemed to do was walk down yellow tinted streets with a crowd of extras looking like they were on their way to a 70’s fancy dress party